How open are you about being on a dating site?

· 412 votes · 117 likes · 54 comments

Are you shouting it from the rooftops or quietly tapping away in private? We asked 412 members how much of their dating life the rest of their world gets to see — and the answers say a lot about modern Ireland.

Top answer

I keep it completely private until I'm in a real relationship

29.4%

Nearly three in ten members keep their dating life to themselves — but "close friends and family know" is only two percentage points behind. Ireland is private, but not completely.

I keep it completely private until I'm in a real relationship
29.4% 121 votes
Close friends and family know
27.4% 113 votes
Only my best friend knows
21.6% 89 votes
Tell everyone — I'm not hiding it
11.4% 47 votes
Discreet profile only — no recent photo or real name
10.2% 42 votes

How different groups voted

By gender

Numbers show votes within each option. Privacy levels are broadly similar across genders, but the discreet-profile option was heavily female — nearly two-thirds of those who chose it were women.

Completely private

Men
60
Women
58
Other
3

Close friends and family know

Men
50
Women
60
Other
3

Only my best friend knows

Men
35
Women
52
Other
2

Tell everyone

Men
22
Women
23
Other
2

Discreet profile only

Men
14
Women
27
Other
1

By age group

Each cell shows what percentage of that age group chose each option. The contrast between "tell everyone" (a young person's answer) and "discreet profile only" (a 55+ answer) is the sharpest generational divide in any poll we've run.

Option 18–24 25–34 35–44 45–54 55+
Completely private
18.5%
24.4%
30.2%
31.8%
33.7%
Close friends & family
29.6%
28.9%
30.2%
29.5%
20.8%
Only my best friend
18.5%
23.3%
24.5%
21.6%
17.8%
Tell everyone
33.3%
21.1%
10.4%
6.8%
2.0%
Discreet profile only
0.0%
2.2%
4.7%
10.2%
25.7%

What the numbers say

Ireland is private — but not uniformly so, and not across all ages. The overall result masks one of the sharpest generational divides we've seen in any Grounded poll. Among 18–24 year olds, "tell everyone" was the single most popular answer at 33.3%. Among the 55+ bracket, the same option was chosen by just 2%. Privacy, it turns out, is something you acquire with age.

The mirror image is the discreet profile option — no recent photo, no real name. Not a single 18–24 respondent chose it. By the 45–54 bracket, one in ten did. By the 55+ bracket, it jumped to 25.7% — making it the second most common answer in that age group, effectively tying with "close friends and family know." For older members, the concern about being recognised locally is real, and the platform needs to earn that trust before they'll show their face.

The gender split on the discreet option stands out: 64% of those who chose it were women. That's the most gender-skewed answer in this poll, and it echoes a broader pattern — women on dating platforms face different visibility risks than men, and many are making a considered choice about what to show until they're confident in who's looking. Worth bearing in mind when reading profile completeness stats from this community.

Perhaps the most reassuring finding: across the three middle options (private, friends know, best friend only), the 35–44 bracket split almost exactly evenly between "completely private" and "close friends and family know" — 30.2% each. That age group hasn't fully closed off; they're just thoughtful about the audience. The combination of the top three answers accounts for 78.4% of all votes, which suggests the vast majority of Grounded members are somewhere on a spectrum of selective disclosure — not hiding in shame, but not broadcasting either. Grand.

Poll ran 29 April – 6 May 2026. 412 Grounded members responded. Self-reported demographics from member profiles.

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